im always thirsty

oh man, I should work on planning my meals like ashley. I have no idea what im eating ever haha. The hardest meal of the day for me is lunch time. Hardest because im at work and its the difference between eating out and bringing my lunch. If I bring my lunch I have to make it or prepare it before work which takes effort and if i eat out i risk diving into bad food out of hunger and spending money. So instead of planning out my week which can be a bit hard I will plan out the day before...tomorrow morning i will eat some oatmeal and a banana (or cold cereal), and for lunch i will eat either a grilled chicken salad that i make in the morning or some sort of sandwich (how vague am I?) The groceries will not be here until tomorrow, so im not sure what I actually have to eat in there. Tomorrow for dinner i want to make some sort of rice, chicken and vegetable dish. Or possibly oatmeal all day?

I lost 2 lbs this week! my meetings are going well, the leader makes me a bit nervous. She is very thin, with bright blonde hair. She wears bright pant suites and reminds me a lot of ashleys old room mate sandra sue. I was standing in line and she yells "its not that bad is it?" i hate that...if i had a dollar for ever time someone said that to me. Its as if I should be having a party in the weigh-in line of weight watchers. Possibly my face reads "my cat just got ran over" or "i hate life" but actually im just in line and waiting. or as new yorkers say "on line". thats drives me crazy by the way, how can you be on line at the store? when I hear on line I think of the internet, not a line waiting to check out. When someone here says "oh, were you on line" it takes me a second to realize what in the world they are asking.

anyway... so in the meeting she did the usual "were there any successes this week?" and i raise my hand and say that i lost two pounds, they clap and I just sit there. She says "you dont seem happy about this" (i mumble something about stress) and i want to say "i lost two pounds before, get back to me at the 40lb mark" not that I was sitting there pouting, I just dont want to be obnoxious about 2 pounds on my first week, perhaps 2 pounds after my 16th week would merit a dance party. I have problems with expressing emotions to strangers most of the time anyway, or not even strangers, a lot of people. When Im happy for someone they usually think im being sarcastic. But, thats just something ill have to work on. Perhaps next week at the meeting i will get up and do the cabbage-patch?

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